She was sweet, loving, affectionate, gentle, faithful, beautiful, and courageous. She enchanted me from the first moment I saw her. I paid for her freedom from slavery. Her creator raised her and other animals to make money. Her destiny was to replace her mother and give birth to puppies for the man who kept them in captivity. I wish I could set free and provide a better life to other little angels in similar conditions in shelters and those abandoned on the streets. It is cruel to know that there are so many to be cared for and so few humans willing to dedicate themselves the way they deserve.
She whimpered about missing her mother on the first night in her new home. She hid under the furniture, afraid that someone would hurt her. Her helpless, fearful look, sad for having been taken away from her fellows, broke my heart.
I thought all day long about her well-being and how to make her feel loved, fulfilling her mission in her life. I took on the responsibility of raising her for my entire life with the best I could offer, but the opposite happened. She transformed my life. I bought her freedom, and she won my heart!
She grew up with intense energy and joy! It is indescribable the feeling I had when I saw her smiling, running, playing, discovering the world! She took me to places I knew but didn't have time to enjoy. I felt dismayed when I couldn't take her to places I wanted to visit. Her purity and simplicity in being with me were enough to make her happy. The many photos taken were not enough to show how glad she was because, for her, they mattered nothing. Her smile challenged me to play. When I couldn't keep up with her, she played along with whatever she found around. It frustrated me that she was without other dogs to accompany her in these moments.
She didn't care about my past, who I was and who I am, or my insignificance. She knew nothing about me; she only cared about how much she needed me. She didn't demand anything I couldn't give her, and she was content with my caress and affection. She always forgave me, even when I said I missed another dog that was part of my life and was gone decades before she was born. She could not understand my words of affection. So I compensated with many hugs and let her walk in the open air, off-leash.
She trusted that her dedication to me would be the love I needed to continue living. In times of sadness and confinement, she gave me the courage to explore the world and face everything with an open heart. By her side, I feared nothing. She knew that I would protect her against everything, but deep down, in some moments, it was just the opposite; she was the one watching over me.
She loved my relatives and took them as her own too. She celebrated the presence of everyone without distinction, even if some didn't like her affection. To each one who ignored her, I understood that they were not worthy of the devotion she showed. What she expressed was the care she had for me. She put me on a pedestal, but she was the real star. She came to teach me, to try to make me less troubled than I am.
Even when my days were not at their best, she forgave me and ran to me, regardless of my rudeness. I met people and saw life in a way I had never imagined. Her love made me generous and understanding. It was enough for her to be by my side. I was not afraid or ashamed to express how much I loved her. She was my light, the angel, the gift I received from life, even though I was undeserving.
As time went by, her physical vigor diminished. Her health problems appeared, my expenses increased, and so did my ardent requests for her healing. In my innermost desires, I asked the universe to allow me to be with her at all times. I feared that I would die before her, and no one would take care of her with the care she needed, not that she demanded it from me. She would probably miss me, and I didn't want her to suffer because of that. Also, I couldn't bear her departure. Knowing the finitude and the impossibility of having her by my side, I asked the Creator to abbreviate my existence. I acknowledge my weakness and smallness and that I can not go on without her. To continue life without her will not be easy. I promised her that wherever I went, I would take her, and wherever she went, I would go after. I will never abandon her again! If I can go where she is, it is a mystery I cannot answer. If it depends only on my choice, I renounce any other possibility, just as I did in life.
I, old, sick, had the opportunity to know kindness and give new meaning to my perception of life. When she was at the peak of her physical vigor, I kept thinking about how it would be without her. I remembered how empty and meaningless my life was before I adopted her. I suffered when another dog of mine died decades before she was born. My life went on with much regret and pain. If I had carried out the plan I had thought, I would not have met her. I do not wish, and I do not have the means to have any other company; but just the two loving beings of light, angels of God, that I met in this life.
I thank God for the chance to make me better; there have been many graces and joys that the dogs have given me. I apologize for not having lived up to match the celestial expectations for me. The hope, or illusion, of a reunion after death is what inspires me, but without great pretensions. If something beyond matter exists, I would like to remeet my dogs. If this is possible, I hope to be able to communicate with them through words! I want to be by their side forever!
I wasn´t, am not, or will not be necessary to the universe. However, I owe a due acknowledgment. I must put in words what the dogs can do. They live alongside and bring joy to unhappy, incomplete people. The good that they sow in us is hope. It may flourish in worthy hearts, available to love life's most varied forms!
You, reader, allow yourself to be worthy of the joy and wisdom of caring for an animal: beings capable of loving, forgiving, and transforming people through simplicity, compassion, and dedication. The shelters are full of animals waiting for a guardian open to the graces of the high heavens! Open your life to purity, simplicity, and the practice of good without expecting anything in return. God bless you!
